Meet the Parents Synopsis Greg Focker (Ben Stiller) wants to propose to his girlfriend, Pam, but must ask her father, Jack Byrnes (Robert DeNiro), for permission. (Note: Greg's last name is the source of a great deal of  humor due to its almost profane pronunciation.) Greg tries to win the Byrnes' approval during the weekend of Pam's sister's wedding, but finds Jack incredibly intimidating and demanding-even more so when Greg learns Jack is a retired CIA interrogator. Greg makes matters horribly worse with escalating social and dumb-luck blunders that render his chances of becoming a son-in-law more remote (and hilarious) by the minute. The Message Meet the Parents keeps you laughing long after it ends with some of the funniest scenes in years. Anyone can relate to desperately wanting to impress someone, and Greg's catastrophic mishaps spring from our worst nightmares. The constant ridicule of and slight anti-Semitism toward Greg is a disappointing undercurrent in the film, especially because the source of ignorance and insensitivity comes from white Protestant characters. In fact, one character explains that he took up carpentry because he wanted to become more like Jesus. The film's focus on trust and honesty, though, redeems it. Most of the disasters stem from a character's lack of honesty. While we naturally gloss over embarrassing facts when meeting someone we wish to impress, this often backfires in the end. Only honesty can build trust, true friendship, and respect between people. Trust built upon falsehood disappears once the truth comes out. While some of the minor details (and Greg's last name) leave something to be desired, the film's core, which regards trust and honesty as admirable qualities, stands strong. Topic for Discussion God expresses his compassion through grace and mercy. Case in Point: Greg desperately seeks the approval of his girlfriend's hard-nosed ex-CIA father. Jack corners Greg and asks if he understood Jack's "circle of trust," because there's no way back into the circle once you're thrown out. Greg understands and wants to stay in the circle. Jack asks Greg if there's anything he wants to confess, but Greg's utterly clueless and confesses nothing. Jack tells Greg he's watching him like a hawk and will "take him down" for even the smallest slip-up. More Than A Movie: Is this how you see God? Many people think God watches their every move, waiting for the slightest slip-up so he can punish and cast them outside his circle of protection. Some people even fear that they will unwittingly commit some heinous sin that God will hold against them. God isn't consumed with anger and judgment, and  God isn't waiting for you to slip up, He's mealy waiting for you to fall into his grace. Discussion Questions:  ·Is this how you picture God, watching your every move? Why or why not? ·What is you mental picture of God?  ·Read aloud Micah 7:18-20. How does this description of God differ from the movie clip's depiction of Jack? ·How does this passage affect your mental picture of God?  ·How can God be compassionate and a judge at the same time?  ·How can a holy God "pass over" our rebellious acts?  ·Are their any sins you need to cast under God's feet?  Topic for Discussion Some people live by the letter of the law. Case in Point: Greg desperately seeks the approval of his girlfriend's hard-nosed ex-CIA father. An airline attendant won't let Greg board his plane because she hasn't called his row yet. Greg looks around and there's no one else waiting to get on the plane, but she still makes him wait. She finally calls "all rows" and lets Greg board. More Than a Movie: This hilarious clip is legalism at its peak-following rules for the sake of rules, at the expense of compassion. Many times Christians place more importance on the rules than on ministry to hurting people. While Jesus didn't do away with the law, he reserved his harshest criticism for the people who lived and died by it. Look for the sea of grace that exists between legalism and immorality. Discussion Questions:  ·What's the dumbest law you've ever heard of?  ·Why do you think the law was ever put into effect?  ·Read aloud Acts 15:10-11. Do you think the "rules" we set up as Christians keep people from hearing the gospel? Why or why not? ·What are some rules you see as a "yoke"? What reasons do we have for them? ·If we are saved by grace, why does Jesus affirm the biblical law? ·How can we guard our hearts against legalism?  Topic for Discussion Lies will drag you down. Case in Point: Greg desperately seeks the approval of his girlfriend's hard-nosed ex-CIA father. Jack catches Greg in a lie about growing up on a farm. Greg backtracks, trying to "clarify" his statement. Jack pursues the matter, asking Greg what animal he used to milk if he didn't live on a traditional farm. Greg makes up a preposterous story about milking the family cat to feed a weak kitten. More Than a Movie: This one is a little out there, but its absurdity mirrors real life. The natural reaction when confronted about a lie is to spin it out until it continues to cover the truth. Eventually, the lies will grow beyond common sense, crumbling our precarious house of cards. God calls for truth in all of our ways because our words reflect on his truthful character. Honesty is the best policy! Discussion Questions:  ·What's the biggest lie you've ever told?  ·Did the truth ever come out? What happened?  ·What would've happened if you'd told the truth in the first place? ·Read aloud Acts 5:1-10. Why did these people die?  ·Does this seem harsh? Why or why not?  ·Why is the truth so important to God?  ·What are some areas of your life where you can be more truthful? Word to The Wise The following is a brief summary of the content found in this PG-13 rated comedy. Some brief fooling around between an adult boyfriend and girlfriend occurs (kissing, some roaming hands, etc.) along with some non-explicit, sexually related dialogue. A boxed dildo is seen, as is a sexually provocative poster of a woman in a skimpy bikini, a photo in a mothering magazine of a woman with breast pumps attached to her otherwise bare breasts, and a man in a skimpy bathing suit. Profanity consists of 1 possible "f" word, while one of the main characters last name is "Focker," (and done so for laughs due to it sounding rather similar to the "f" word). Beyond that, a number of other expletives and colorful phrases are also used. Various characters drink and one briefly smokes, while we also briefly see a pot pipe that results in a character being accused of being a drug user (with related comments and snide jokes). Various characters have varying degrees of bad attitudes and some slapstick style violence occurs, including that of a woman accidentally being hit in the face with a volleyball, resulting in a fair amount of bleeding. BLOOD/GORE  ·We see an infant spit up on Greg's shirt. ·While playing water volleyball, Greg accidentally spikes the ball into Debbie's face, causing a lot of blood to spill into the pool (and be seen on her face and hands) and we later see her with a swollen/puffy face (but it's all played for laughs instead of gore or shock). ·We see that the septic system has overflowed at the Banks' house and see the yard wet with sewage (with everyone reacting to the smell). Kevin then shows up and backs his truck into the wet yard, not realizing what's happened. He then gets stuck and spins his wheels, sending sewage flying onto everyone but Greg. IMITATIVE BEHAVIOR  ·Phrases: "Oh sh*t," "Loser," "Jeez," "Shut up," "Bite me," "You sick son of a bitch," "Jerk," "Idiot," "Screwed up," "Shut your pie hole" and "Step off, bitch." ·Although we don't see him do it, Greg paints a cat's tail black so that the cat will near perfectly match a missing one. PROFANITY  ·At least 1 possible "f" word (along with more than 15 uses of Greg's last name, "Focker," said to sound rather similar to the "f" word, including 1 with a prefix that sounded like "mother"), 7 "s" words, 4 slang terms for male genitals ("Mr. Winky" and "snake"), 3 damns, 2 hells, 2 S.O.B.s, 1 ass, 5 uses of "Oh my God," 4 of "G-damn" and 2 each of "For Christ's sakes" and "Jesus" as exclamations. SEX/NUDITY  ·We briefly see what looks like home video/movie footage of Pam in a bikini. ·Dina asks Pam (about her and Greg), "Have you two been&ldots;" and Pam says no (thinking she's asking about sex), but Dina then clarifies her question. ·Trying to act like he wasn't just watching Jack, Greg picks up the closest magazine to him (a mothering magazine) and we see a picture of a woman with small breast pumps attached to her nipples (thus leaving the rest of her breasts bare). ·Pam shows some cleavage in her nightgown.  ·In explaining her former relationship with Kevin, Pam tells Greg that it was more physical and "just a stupid sexual thing." After they talk a bit, Greg says "Speaking of growing, Mr. Winky is still on Chicago time" and then goes on that they both know there's only one way to make Mr. Winky go away. When Jack then knocks on her old bedroom door, Greg chimes in, "And there it is." Jack then takes Greg aside and tells him that he realizes Greg and Pam have probably had premarital relations, but states that in his house, "It's my way or the Long Island Expressway." He then tells Greg that he needs to keep his "snake" in its cage for the next 72 hours.