Why Can't We be Friends?
It's Your Move
Work Zone and High Way
At 5 min. till start "Falling for the First Time" - Barenaked Ladies When the song's done, welcome, & introductions, make announcements.
·13 last UMYF, 19-20 Ribs, 20 Sr. Breakfast
Which Way Are We Moving
Road Work, and Trek
Needed: copy of Mat. 5:38-48 & Deu. 21:8-10
Give four youth a copy of the Scriptures listed above. Explain that you will be doing a "crescendo reading." This is a method for group reading of Scripture in which readers are added gradually so that the volume of the reading gets louder and louder. Organize the group before you begin the reading. Assign one person the first three verses then add the second for the next three and so on until everyone is reading loudly by the last three verses.
Read the story
Moving In
Work Zone & High Way
Begin with a large group&ldots;
It's not easy becoming a friend or making one because a friend is not a state of mind, it's real and it's in your face. A friend is someone who makes your life worth its while a little more than yesterday. While everybody has their own definitions of a "friend", the long and short of it is we all need friends to make our lives better.
HONESTY IS THE BEST POLICY...
In friendship "honesty" is the key word. One should always be honest to his or her friends. Say you're sorry, when you hurt your friend. Don't let them assume it.
GIVE MORE THAN YOU TAKE...
Be there when they need you or you may wind up alone. Love them unconditionally and never forget them.
BE SUPPORTIVE...
Cheer them on; encourage their dreams and aspiration. Use good judgment; examine your motives before you "help out". Really listen.
FORGIVENESS...
Forgive them; you just may end up making the same mistakes some day.
KEEP THE FAITH...
Have faith in them. Zip your lips when they confide in you
EXPRESS YOURSELF CLEARLY
Offer to help, and know when " No thanks" is just politeness. Quietly disagree, noisy No's make enemies
HAVE FUN...
Get together often, misery loves company, so does happiness. Talk frequently, communication is important. It's a mutual bond for life that you can't give up.
Break into Journey Groups
Moving In
Work Zone & Highway
Exploring Friendship
Work Zone - fine a cool way to divide up into smaller groups.
Needed: For Road Work - easel & white board
Say: Friends are the lifeblood of your existence. And yet what teenager hasn't had problems with friends? You learn valuable lifelong lessons from friendships, grow in Christ through friends, get into trouble because of friends, and fall in love with friends. Obviously friends are important, because a family can only go so far in providing for your needs, teens crave friendships. And since friends teach each other so much, the friendships you establish can literally make or break your adolescent years. Tonight we are going to talk about the importance of friendships and the influences that friends have on each other-both positive and negative.
Write down all the words that would apply to friendship-love, respect, sense of humor, honesty, trust, and so on.
Ask:
·What are the most important attributes of friends?
·Are some qualities more valuable than others?
·What characteristics are important for different sexes?
·What does it mean to be called a friend?
Moving On
Work Zone & Highway
Chang and Friendships
Say: Teenagers change friends frequently for a variety of reasons-some reasons are good, some aren't. We're going to discuss some examples and share if any of these have happened to you.
Why Friendships Change
__You simply need a change.
__You have an alcohol or drug problem.
__You broke up with a girlfriend or boyfriend.
__You're changing your values.
__You've joined a sports team or club.
__You're trying to change your image.
__You've changed religious beliefs.
__You have a parent who wants you to make a change.
__You aren't in the same crowd as the people you really like.
__You were forced to change friends because of a move.
Moving On
Work Zone & Highway
A Friend is&ldots;
Say: Some parents are more understanding and approachable than others. But some kids don't have good relationships with their parents. Friends are great to confide in, but still keep in mind that their parents have good things to say, too. What do you think about the following statements? Explain.
·Teenagers are more likely to reveal stuff to their friends than to their parents.
·Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art... It has no survival value; rather it's one of those things that gives value to survival.
·Don't walk in front of me, I may not follow, don't walk behind me, I may not lead, walk beside me to be my friend.
·God defend me from my friends; from my enemies I can defend myself.
·Love is blind. Friendship tries not to notice.
·A cheerful friend is like a sunny day spreading brightness all around.
Moving Up
Work Zone & Highway
One Another
Say:
There are many examples of friendship in the Bible. Jesus is also an
example of a loyal, loving friend. He left us many examples and
instructions on how to care for one another.
Ask: Which one of the following is not a "One Another" passage in the bible?
Love one another
Pray for one another
Be patient with one another
Discipline one another
Carry one another's burdens
Don't hold grudges between one another
Worship with one another
Forgive one another
Trick question, they all are in the Bible.
Say:
We're going to go over these again and give an example of ways the
"One Another" passages work between friends.
Moving out
Work Zone
Between Friends
Move to the FLC
Say: We're going to play some partner games. Find a partner and line up.
Say: The object of this first game is for partners to get to the other side of the room, walking as quickly as possible. To begin the race, I'll call out two body joints that you and your partner will put together as you walk. We'll start with finger joint to elbow joint. After each crossing I'll shout out a new joint connection, such as elbow to knee, knee to wrist, wrist to shoulder, and so on. Ready go!
Play clumps: Everyone mingles and moves around in a large group to start with. The leader calls out a body part then quickly a number. The youth try to quickly get into groups of "5-knees" or whatever other combination is called. Anyone left out of a group is out for the round. Play until a few are left.
Play Birdie on a perch: Have one group be the birdies and the other be the perches. A perch is a person kneeling on one knee to make a perch with one leg. Have one more birdie than perches. Have everyone mingle around at go. Then call out "Birdie on a perch", The perches fall to one knee right where they are and the birdies try to find a knee to perch on. The one with out a knee is out and picks a perch to sit out with them. The pair then assumes the perch position on the boundaries of the game for as long as the game lasts.
Play Wink-um if there's still time.
Moving out
High Way
What Would You DO?
Say: You are Dr Phriend, What advice would you give the following patients?
My problem is that the people I consider to be my friends do things that make me think they are not my true friends. When I question them about why I wasn't told or included, the answer is always, "I forgot." Should I just be unconcerned, or is this a sign the friendship is over?
I have a close friend who is a good person. I get along well with her. But when she likes something -- books, videos, CDs -- that I have, she will just borrow it from me even though she can afford to buy her own. I don't mind lending, but the problem is, she does not know when to return the items. It usually takes several months to a year before she returns it. Am I making a big deal about a little thing?
Just how much latitude should be given to the so-called "best friend" who divulges a deep confidence to at least two other friends? I'm embarrassed and very hurt. Should I forgive and forget, or walk away and never look back?
My best friend just found out that his girlfriend of a year is really interested in some other guy. The guy is a mutual friend and lately I've been hanging out with him a lot, so I know what's up. My friend plans on staying with his girlfriend and trying to work it out. How can I be a good friend without telling him what I think he should do?
One of my friends acts like she likes and cares more about another of my friends than me and others. It really hurts my feelings and makes me feel left out and unwanted. The friend that acts this way always sticks to one person for a wk or just cuz, but this has lasted for like 3 wks. What would U do?
I'm a junior in high school. We've been close friends since freshman yr. I talk to her at her locker, carry her books, she laughs at my jokes even when I'm not tryin to be funny. I call her sumtimes. We flirt. I massage her shoulders sumtimes & she touches me a lot...my hands, arms, stomach. She makes eye contact a lot. I think she likes me but I got 1 PROBLEM. She has a BF. They've been goin out for a yr. but she doesn't like to talk about him. I have my junior prom coming up. I told her I wasn't sure if I was goin. But she insisted that I go & I could dance with her most of the night cuz her bf doesn't dance. I asked her today if she could dance she said she's a freak on the dance floor & she smiled saying I'd have my shot. Does she like me? What should I do at the prom?
Come back together
Closing
Work Zone & High Way
The Leader Closes: Gather in a circle.
Sum up the lesson
Say: It's not easy becoming a friend or making one because a friend is not a state of mind, it's real. Being a Christian is just as real and friendships play an important part in our faith journey.
As we bring this lesson to a close, realize that this is the end of a little piece of your life. You will never be hear again with these same people, in this same place, that this point in your life.
Next week we will be celebrating the end of this school year and beginning our summer schedule. Some of you have many more years here at West Heights for some - this is the beginning of many lasts. But, through it all you have your friends, those people who make your life a little more worthwhile than yesterday.
Make the most of those friends you are closest with and rekindle the friendships you have let slip. Forgive those that have forgotten you and move to make every day count. Get together often, trust each other unconditionally and never forget the lessons you've learned together.
Close In Prayer: Dear Lord, we've come together as a group one last time in this way and continue to do your work. Thank you for your trust and forgiveness. Grant us the strength to do your work, bound together as friends in this moment in time and in the future. Bless us in your service. In Jesus name we pray, Amen.
Sing Sanctuary
UMYF Benediction
